Religious Experience

I've always said that going to Iggy's Doughboys & Chowder House on Oakland Beach was similar to a religious experience. I just never thought that I'd have the most awkward religious conversation of my life in the line out front...and I spent 13 years in Catholic schools.
It was a gorgeous spring day in Rhode Island today so, obviously, I had a craving for clam strips...along with the rest of the Ocean State residents.
I got in line and, while there, the woman in front of me turned away from her friend and introduced herself to me. Her name was Tracy. The next words out of her mouth completely stunned me.
"Do you read the Bible?"
It was like my father and Sister Joseph Michael SSJ (RIP) had sent this woman into my life to fix me.
I didn't know what to say. My response was delayed but once I could form words, I stated the fact that I spent 13 years in Catholic school...uniform and all.
Then, my good friend Tracy, preached to me for what seemed like 20 minutes but was probably only three. Are you aware that you can know you'll get into heaven if you just read the Bible? Apparently, everything else is just tradition.
Once she wrapped up her sermon, she reached into her purse and pulled out a recording of what I have to assume is the local church's Easter Sunday Mass.
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What?
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Why do you have a Mass recording in your purse, lady? Do you have more CDs in your purse ready for distribution?
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Why doesn't your friend look shocked that you're having this one-sided conversation right now? This is clearly a situation that she's been in several times before.
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I can appreciate someone who has strong religious beliefs but is it necessary to back someone into a corner and force your opinions upon them? I, of course, was not cornered. I could've just stepped out of line if I felt too uncomfortable with the conversation. My dedication to Iggy's outweighed my discomfort with the kooky woman in line.
I may be struck by lightning for saying this but Iggy is my god now.