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For years, I've found myself in ridiculous situations...and, now, you'll hear all about them.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Jessica Simpson Moments

I know it's hard to believe but I have been known to have "Jessica Simpson moments".
For those of you not into pop culture, Jessica Simpson is a blond-haired, recording artist, actress, fashion designer and reality personality. She came onto the music scene in the late nineties and was everywhere you looked in 2003. Unfortunately, her fame has steadily declined since.
In 2003, she and then-husband Nick Lachey were featured in MTV's reality show Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica. It was at that point that I became quite fond of her. She became real. It was exposed that she was a real girl that had real issues and said really dumb things.
One of my favorites was when she questioned whether a can of  "Chicken of the Sea" contained chicken or fish. The scene goes a little like this...
Jessica: "Is this chicken what I have or is this fish? I know it's tuna but it says 'Chicken...by the Sea'. Is that stupid?"
Nick: (thinking "I can't believe I married this idiot.")
The poor girl took such a social beating for this one simple misunderstanding. Saturday Night Live and MAD TV both did parodies of the episode and you know you've made a boo boo when that happens.
I made a similar slip the other night while watching the Detroit Tigers v. New York Yankees game. The game was being played in Detroit and in the outfield there was a sign for University of Toledo. Now, I know that Toledo is in Ohio. I'm not sure how I know that but at least I know that much.
The next sentence that came out of my mouth was Simpson-esque. The scene goes a little like this...
Trish: "Is Detroit in Ohio?"
Mike: (thinking "I can't believe I'm dating this idiot.")
I knew it sounded ridiculous the second it came out of my mouth but there was no going back. Mike denied that the city of Detroit was located in the state of Ohio. He reminded me that Detroit was, in fact, located in Michigan. This fact floored me because not only was Michigan not my first choice, it wasn't even my second choice. I was convinced it was in Ohio...or Illinois.
All I have to say is that I'm thankful that no MTV cameras were following me watching my every move. Had they been present, NBC would've caught wind that I was a complete idiot and Aidy Bryant (with help from Bobby Moynihan) would've made the country laugh at my expense.