The Charm Of A Dive Bar

While home in Western Mass for Christmas, I met two high school friends out at a local dive bar. You know the type - they have them in every small town in America (I hope) - the cash-only watering hole where the patrons are either kids you babysat for in your youth or Senior Center escapees. The floor boards creak, the chairs need to be replaced, and the neon beer signs give the place an interesting glow.
We sat at the corner of the bar and reminisced about old times and gossiped about what former classmates are doing now with their lives. Those conversations quickly ceased when we started watching three older patrons on the other side of the bar as if they, themselves, were a train wreck. Their antics were far surpassing the actions of us young whippersnappers. I mean, things got weird and they got weird quickly. I didn't want to look but I couldn't turn away.
If I had to guess, I'd say these three...individuals...were in their late-sixties or seventies. Two women and one man. Look, I don't want to relive it by getting into specifics but things were happening between the three of them - sexual things - that grown adults shouldn't do in a near-empty bar...in front of the TV showing the Patriots game. Don't you people know that everyone is staring at you in disgust? No? Well, now you do.
One woman got up off her stool and attempted to reach the ladies room just a few steps away. Yes, the key word is attempted. We all heard a loud thud and glanced over at the woman to find her lying on the floor. Better people than me ran over to the woman's aid. She had hit her head on the bathroom door...or the floor...and had quite a large gash in her forehead. The bartender and patrons helped the woman off the floor and back into her chair, where they tended to her wound.
It must be noted that the other woman and the man that were with her...intimately...looked annoyed that poor ol' "Ma" was so intoxicated/old that she fell over and, thus, botched their plans for any post-bar festivities. Hell, the other woman was drinking her wine while supporting "Ma's" head, all the while rolling her eyes at the old man in the rugby shirt.
The ambulance/EMTs were called and, once decided that she needed to go to the hospital because she hit her head and probably needed stitches, they brought the stretcher in and carted "Ma" out. The other lady went with her to the hospital in the ambulance and the man was told he was cut off. No more drinks for you, sir.
The bartender got the good Samaritans a beer as a thank you and before they could even take a sip, one of the EMTs came back in and told us that we needed to evacuate the bar because there was a gas leak. What in the world?!?!
Did the fall cause the gas leak or did the gas leak cause "Ma" to fall?
I'd like to think that "Ma" was a Christmas angel sent to save us all from the Agawam Gas Leak of 2013.
In any event, it was a memorable night, to say the least. Oh, the charm of a dive bar!

Free Money

Have you ever been so distracted that you completely forgot what you're doing? Have you ever gotten up off the couch and walked to the refrigerator and it wasn't until you opened the door and the cold air hit your face that you realized that you didn't even know why you got up in the first place?
Well, this happened just the other night...to someone other than me.
As I was driving through the fine city of Providence, I stopped at the ATM for some dolla-dolla-bills, y'all. I enjoy going to this one location, in particular, because it's attached to a Boston Market. Not only do I retrieve the money that I request from the machine but I also get a delicious chicken scent wafting in through my open car window.
As I pulled up there was a car in line ahead of me. I waited patiently.
When they pulled away, I drove up to the machine and got my debit card ready. When I turned to insert my card into the machine, I noticed that the car in front of me had driven off without their money.
The money - I'm going to guess at least $80 - sat in the machine, which was still beeping. I assumed the beeps translated to, "Hey dummy! Forgetting something?"
I didn't know what to do. The driver of the car just drove off without a second thought. The bank branch was closed so it's not like I could've notified someone inside the facility.
The angel and devil in me debated my next step.
"I could really use that money."
"There's a camera on you, dummy!"
When I finally decided on the fact that I wasn't going to steal this innocent person's money from the machine, the machine sucked those bills back in. I completed my transaction and went on my merry way.
I guess I'm still confused as to how you could stop at the ATM, press all of the necessary buttons, take your receipt but not take the cash. That individual was in for a very big surprise when they attempted to make their next purchase. They probably assumed that I stole it. Jerks!

I'm Still Thankful

2013, to date, hasn't been a great year for me. I consider it my Murphy's Law year - "Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong" - and, unfortunately, it sure has. Luckily for me, 2014 is just around the corner and things are looking up.
This past Thanksgiving really got me thinking about what I'm thankful for in my life. In a crappy year like I've had this year, one might think that that list is short...empty even. I mean, I am single again, supposed friends have shown their true colors and have been demoted from "Trish's friend" to "crappy human", and every morning before peeling myself out of bed I think to myself "would I rather go to work or jump off a bridge?"
What's interesting to me is that while being at rock bottom I still have so many wonderful blessings that I would be remiss if I didn't mention...in type...for the world to see.
I am thankful for my wonderful friends, family and support system. You all know who you are and I truly can't imagine (and don't want to imagine) the shell of a person I'd be without all of your thoughtful cards, flower deliveries, shoulders/bathroom floors to catch my tears, calls, texts, glasses of wine, and girls' nights full of debauchery.
I'm thankful for my parents for creating a decent human being - ME. Luckily, after all of the nonsense that has gone on these past few months, I'm still a good person down to my core. Not completely jaded or cynical yet.
I am thankful for my job - my annoying, stressful, full-time, paying job.
I am thankful for my condo. Even though you haven't yet learned how to clean yourself on your own, I'm still glad you're in my life. Also, thanks for keeping all of my stuff safe.
I am thankful that my car, "The Grey Lady", although way over the allowed lease miles, is still running well and has not caused me any headaches in the 2.5 years I've had it in my life.
Other quick notes:
I'm thankful for my health, New Girl, 2013 Red Sox World Series win, the recent refund check I received in the mail from Rhode Island Housing, and a successful broccoli and cheese combo.
Perhaps I should've moved "my health" out of the quick notes to it's own item...but, whatever...you get the idea.

The Golden Rule

This will not be a religious-themed blog. Honest.
Are Catholic schools the only schools that teach the most important social rule - The Golden Rule?

"So whatever you wish that others would do to you,

do also to them"

I'm starting to lose my faith in humanity. Why do people find it acceptable to treat people poorly? Is it that difficult to be honest with people? To be kind and generous and understanding?

I find it hard to believe that I'm one of the few that know about this concept and apply it in my everyday life...and if people do know about this rule, why do so many people in today's society disregard it?

I suggest we have a refresher course...perhaps an exam. Those that fail the course are locked in a room with Justin Bieber...or need to move in with the Kardashians. Just a thought.

Anyway, all I ask is that if I'm good to you, please be good to me. Please and thank you.

Freak On A Leash

One September afternoon, I saw a couple walking through the mall together. Cute.
She was walking him on a leash. Not so cute.

That is all.

Sidenote: When I searched Google images for "man on a leash" I found pictures of Adam Lambert. Ha.

Smile. You're On Candid Camera!

Once upon a time, also known as last night, I went to dinner with a friend named Joan (name changed to protect anonymity). Neither of us ever have cash on us so we each put a debit card on the bill and split it down the middle. I got the odd penny out...like always!
We each grabbed a debit card, our respective leftovers and parted ways in the parking lot. I stopped at Walgreen's on the way home to pick up necessities - face wash, body wash and toilet paper. Again, I have no cash so out comes the plastic.
This morning when I got to work, Joan called, texted and emailed me. "She must be on fire!" I thought. Luckily, once we connected I realized she wasn't on fire. Instead, she informed me that we had grabbed the wrong debit card at the restaurant and that I had hers.
My first reaction was "OH CRAP! I think I totally just used her card to purchase my toiletries." I immediately logged into my Target Credit Card account, praying that I would see the transaction there. Nope, no Walgreen's transaction to be found. Great! Ugh...
Joan advised me that my purchase total was larger than the available balance on the card. I figured that the dinner charge hadn't posted yet and that I somehow sneaked the Walgreen's charge in. Perhaps I still have time to get money in her account before Gregg's Restaurant figures it out!
I left work in a panic, swiftly walking to the closest Sovereign Bank. I went to the teller to take money out of my own personal checking account. Then, I walked over to the ATM machine around the corner with Joan's debit card in hand. While looking for her PIN number in my recent texts, I saw that I had received other texts from Joan. She was calling Sovereign Bank to put a hold on her card so that she doesn't get charged overdraft fees.
I rolled my eyes because this is becoming ridiculous. I walked back over to the same teller and tried to convince her that I'm not a crazy person. I don't think she bought it.
With Joan's ATM card disabled, the teller allowed me to deposit money into Joan's account - the amount of the Walgreen's charge and a little padding to cover any potential overdraft fees.
Problem solved...or so I thought.
I got back to work, red in the face, and I read an email from Joan. During her conversation with the representative at Sovereign Bank, she was told that a new debit card would be sent to her and was advised to destroy her current debit card.
That's right, folks. Joan reached into her wallet and without an other thought in her head cut up the Sovereign Bank debit card. Unfortunately, that Sovereign Bank debit card had my name proudly displayed on the front.
As I read said email, I started to laugh...and then become annoyed...but then laughed again. I just couldn't get over how jumbled up this innocent mistake had gotten. The last thing I want to do is track down all of my automatic withdrawals to change my debit card information.
I stopped at a different branch location on my way home from work tonight to take cash out for the week and request a duplicate debit card (same number, expiration date, etc) be mailed to me. I should get that in seven-to-ten business days. We're almost back to normal.
I just got home and dug out the Walgreen's receipt out of the plastic shopping bag and, of course, the last four digits of the card I used to make my purchase are not the same ones on Joan's disabled card. Only God knows why the Walgreen's purchase is nowhere to be found within my Target Credit Card account summary of recent transactions. Well, God and the producer of the Candid Camera television show that has been following me around today. I feel like Joan and I have been punked.
This whole thing was for nothing and now Joan owes me $50. The lengths I will go to to get you all an entertaining blog! I tell ya...

What's The Rush?

Today is Saturday, July 20th and it's 98* in Rhode Island with a heat index of over 100*. Because of these facts, it was impossible for me not to laugh out loud when I saw a temporary Halloween superstore pop up on Route 2 this weekend.
Just a few weeks ago, I shared a photo on Facebook of a Back-to-School school uniform display at Old Navy. Let's face it, people (mostly parents and/or teachers) got angry because it's "way too early" to think about sending the youngsters back to school or for them to start working on their syllabuses for the upcoming school year.
Then, earlier this week, I saw a photo posted on a well-known author's Facebook page of a Christmas decor aisle at Hobby Lobby. The photo showed colorful ornaments and artificial greenery - perfect supplies for any home's fireplace mantle between Black Friday and New Year's Day.
My question for you, loyal blog followers, is "Why do we rush everything?" Is it because we want to be prepared or is it because we just can't wait any longer?
Dr. Phil McGraw is known for saying, "You want what you want when you want it...and you want it now."
I'm all for planning ahead but I'm really trying my best to live in the moment. That means I will not think too much about a holiday until that's the next holiday on the calendar. No more Christmas tree up before Thanksgiving dinner. No more purchasing Cadbury Eggs before the St. Patrick's Day parade passes by. No more sparklers before...oh, hell, sparklers are always acceptable!
Can't we all try to live in the moment and take one day at a time? Make the best of each day. Live it as if it were your last. Carpe diem!