Menace To Society

They're in every city in America. They leave destruction in their wake. They're social deviants. They are laundry basket breakers.
A recent Saturday morning was marred by a senseless act of vandalism.
A spunky, 33-year-old vixen in lounge pants was playing the role of a domestic goddess. She carried her white laundry basket piled high with her dirty laundry, detergent and quarters down the short hallway to the laundry room in her building. After the clothes, the detergent and the quarters were placed in their respective homes in the washing machine, she placed her laundry basket atop said washer for easy access after the cycle was completed and returned to her condo to wait.
After 30 minutes, she returned to the laundry room to find her laundry basket upside down on the floor with one of the handles detached and on the floor several feet away.
She will never be able to unsee this carnage, unfeel this violation, understand why something so heinous and senseless occurred to something so innocent and pure.
Use caution. Be vigilant. Keep your loved ones and your laundry baskets close.
Rest in peace, laundry basket. Rest in peace.

2013: A Retrospective

Ever leave a movie theater and think, "I just wasted my money on that? What a waste of time!"? Well, that's how I feel about 2013.
Many give the number 13 a bad rap but I've always given 13 a fair shot. In my younger softball days, I used to battle teammates for number 13. There is no real rhyme or reason for it but I always had a fondness for it. Perhaps it's the visual of the number - a straight line followed by one of the most voluptuous numbers there is. Maybe it was the motion of hand writing it that I enjoyed. All I know is that I truly loved that number...UNTIL NOW!

This past year was, without question, the worst year of my life. I'm not trying to be overly dramatic but this year really tested my strength and sanity. I went through some really hard times at work, in my relationships and my "friend"ships. People took advantage of me, betrayed me and, frankly, kicked me while I was down. Unfortunately, most tears shed in 2013 were not tears of joy.
Let me be the first to tell you that that nonsense stops right here...right now. No longer will I allow utter knuckleheads to completely break my spirit and make me feel so bad about myself that I isolate from friends and family, and cry at the drop of a hat...or a commercial...or a song on the radio...or anything, really.
Perhaps I needed to hit rock bottom so I could grow and shine brighter than ever. Well, friends, get out those sunglasses. I'm about to 180* this bitch!
I will admit that 2013 wasn't all for nothing. I mean, it's always beneficial to get a reality check. This past year made it abundantly clear who my true friends are and who I can trust. I got a real good picture of who's looking out for me and who's just trying to take me down.
(Sounds so Melrose Place, right?)
Luckily, there's only one direction to travel when you're down this low. Onwards and upwards.
To those that were there for me in my "time of need", I will not soon forget it. Good things will come to you.
I just hope some of those good things will come to me too. Actually, maybe some of them should come to me first. I think I'm due.

The Charm Of A Dive Bar

While home in Western Mass for Christmas, I met two high school friends out at a local dive bar. You know the type - they have them in every small town in America (I hope) - the cash-only watering hole where the patrons are either kids you babysat for in your youth or Senior Center escapees. The floor boards creak, the chairs need to be replaced, and the neon beer signs give the place an interesting glow.
We sat at the corner of the bar and reminisced about old times and gossiped about what former classmates are doing now with their lives. Those conversations quickly ceased when we started watching three older patrons on the other side of the bar as if they, themselves, were a train wreck. Their antics were far surpassing the actions of us young whippersnappers. I mean, things got weird and they got weird quickly. I didn't want to look but I couldn't turn away.
If I had to guess, I'd say these three...individuals...were in their late-sixties or seventies. Two women and one man. Look, I don't want to relive it by getting into specifics but things were happening between the three of them - sexual things - that grown adults shouldn't do in a near-empty bar...in front of the TV showing the Patriots game. Don't you people know that everyone is staring at you in disgust? No? Well, now you do.
One woman got up off her stool and attempted to reach the ladies room just a few steps away. Yes, the key word is attempted. We all heard a loud thud and glanced over at the woman to find her lying on the floor. Better people than me ran over to the woman's aid. She had hit her head on the bathroom door...or the floor...and had quite a large gash in her forehead. The bartender and patrons helped the woman off the floor and back into her chair, where they tended to her wound.
It must be noted that the other woman and the man that were with her...intimately...looked annoyed that poor ol' "Ma" was so intoxicated/old that she fell over and, thus, botched their plans for any post-bar festivities. Hell, the other woman was drinking her wine while supporting "Ma's" head, all the while rolling her eyes at the old man in the rugby shirt.
The ambulance/EMTs were called and, once decided that she needed to go to the hospital because she hit her head and probably needed stitches, they brought the stretcher in and carted "Ma" out. The other lady went with her to the hospital in the ambulance and the man was told he was cut off. No more drinks for you, sir.
The bartender got the good Samaritans a beer as a thank you and before they could even take a sip, one of the EMTs came back in and told us that we needed to evacuate the bar because there was a gas leak. What in the world?!?!
Did the fall cause the gas leak or did the gas leak cause "Ma" to fall?
I'd like to think that "Ma" was a Christmas angel sent to save us all from the Agawam Gas Leak of 2013.
In any event, it was a memorable night, to say the least. Oh, the charm of a dive bar!

Free Money

Have you ever been so distracted that you completely forgot what you're doing? Have you ever gotten up off the couch and walked to the refrigerator and it wasn't until you opened the door and the cold air hit your face that you realized that you didn't even know why you got up in the first place?
Well, this happened just the other night...to someone other than me.
As I was driving through the fine city of Providence, I stopped at the ATM for some dolla-dolla-bills, y'all. I enjoy going to this one location, in particular, because it's attached to a Boston Market. Not only do I retrieve the money that I request from the machine but I also get a delicious chicken scent wafting in through my open car window.
As I pulled up there was a car in line ahead of me. I waited patiently.
When they pulled away, I drove up to the machine and got my debit card ready. When I turned to insert my card into the machine, I noticed that the car in front of me had driven off without their money.
The money - I'm going to guess at least $80 - sat in the machine, which was still beeping. I assumed the beeps translated to, "Hey dummy! Forgetting something?"
I didn't know what to do. The driver of the car just drove off without a second thought. The bank branch was closed so it's not like I could've notified someone inside the facility.
The angel and devil in me debated my next step.
"I could really use that money."
"There's a camera on you, dummy!"
When I finally decided on the fact that I wasn't going to steal this innocent person's money from the machine, the machine sucked those bills back in. I completed my transaction and went on my merry way.
I guess I'm still confused as to how you could stop at the ATM, press all of the necessary buttons, take your receipt but not take the cash. That individual was in for a very big surprise when they attempted to make their next purchase. They probably assumed that I stole it. Jerks!

I'm Still Thankful

2013, to date, hasn't been a great year for me. I consider it my Murphy's Law year - "Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong" - and, unfortunately, it sure has. Luckily for me, 2014 is just around the corner and things are looking up.
This past Thanksgiving really got me thinking about what I'm thankful for in my life. In a crappy year like I've had this year, one might think that that list is short...empty even. I mean, I am single again, supposed friends have shown their true colors and have been demoted from "Trish's friend" to "crappy human", and every morning before peeling myself out of bed I think to myself "would I rather go to work or jump off a bridge?"
What's interesting to me is that while being at rock bottom I still have so many wonderful blessings that I would be remiss if I didn't mention...in type...for the world to see.
I am thankful for my wonderful friends, family and support system. You all know who you are and I truly can't imagine (and don't want to imagine) the shell of a person I'd be without all of your thoughtful cards, flower deliveries, shoulders/bathroom floors to catch my tears, calls, texts, glasses of wine, and girls' nights full of debauchery.
I'm thankful for my parents for creating a decent human being - ME. Luckily, after all of the nonsense that has gone on these past few months, I'm still a good person down to my core. Not completely jaded or cynical yet.
I am thankful for my job - my annoying, stressful, full-time, paying job.
I am thankful for my condo. Even though you haven't yet learned how to clean yourself on your own, I'm still glad you're in my life. Also, thanks for keeping all of my stuff safe.
I am thankful that my car, "The Grey Lady", although way over the allowed lease miles, is still running well and has not caused me any headaches in the 2.5 years I've had it in my life.
Other quick notes:
I'm thankful for my health, New Girl, 2013 Red Sox World Series win, the recent refund check I received in the mail from Rhode Island Housing, and a successful broccoli and cheese combo.
Perhaps I should've moved "my health" out of the quick notes to it's own item...but, whatever...you get the idea.

The Golden Rule

This will not be a religious-themed blog. Honest.
Are Catholic schools the only schools that teach the most important social rule - The Golden Rule?

"So whatever you wish that others would do to you,

do also to them"

I'm starting to lose my faith in humanity. Why do people find it acceptable to treat people poorly? Is it that difficult to be honest with people? To be kind and generous and understanding?

I find it hard to believe that I'm one of the few that know about this concept and apply it in my everyday life...and if people do know about this rule, why do so many people in today's society disregard it?

I suggest we have a refresher course...perhaps an exam. Those that fail the course are locked in a room with Justin Bieber...or need to move in with the Kardashians. Just a thought.

Anyway, all I ask is that if I'm good to you, please be good to me. Please and thank you.

Freak On A Leash

One September afternoon, I saw a couple walking through the mall together. Cute.
She was walking him on a leash. Not so cute.

That is all.

Sidenote: When I searched Google images for "man on a leash" I found pictures of Adam Lambert. Ha.